The Parable of the Oil Change

Once upon a time there was great king.  King Matt was kind, and good and handsome beyond compare.  His queen was daily grateful for his ever present humor, love, support, and wisdom.  His many talents blessed his family and his kingdom.  Though he maintained a wit befitting his station, he did not think himself above those whom he served.  King Matt would often don peasant apparel and walk among his subjects, helping them move from one cottage to another and playing games with the youths of his kingdom.  His royal hands were rough and callused from laboring to split the wood necessary to warm the castle.  Thus it was that King Matt became beloved to all his family and subjects, so much so that while they were not the grandest kingdom in the land, they were the happiest and most contented.


One day, King Matt noticed that his royal carriage was showing the signs of needing some maintenance.  “The carriage oil is dirty and needs to be changed forthwith,” he told the queen.  “I shall not bother the servants with this tedious work when I am perfectly capable of performing the task on my own.”  Indeed the king was quite adept at carriage maintenance.  He donned his royal coveralls and marched into the bitter cold to give his thirsty beast fresh oil.

After some time he came back into the castle, the queen was quite shocked to see his visage, “Something vexes thee?” she asked.

“I cannot remove the drain plug,” said he, “it is so tightly turned into the carriage that no amount of leverage on my part will loosen it.”  Having purchased the carriage from another king who did not do his own carriage maintenance, and being the first time the oil was refreshed on this carriage since the king and queen had purchased it, this proved to be quite a disappointment and King Matt’s usual peaceful countenance had become increasingly sour.  “It appears as if the previous king took it to an incompetent mechanic.  He must have used a magician to fix the plug in so that none but he could remove it.  Now, I must bother someone else to do a job that I am perfectly capable of doing,” the king took a deep breath, “Don’t these other kings know that just because a person claims to be a Master, doesn’t mean he is?  These ‘Master Mechanics’ are likely no more than mere apprentices!  Though it pains me, I must seek the services of someone else.”

“Lord Walmart can perform this thing?” asked Queen Courtney.

“Nay, he is not equipped to handle carriage maintenance.”

“But surely his brother, the Duke of Walmart, the one who resides in the next kingdom can be of assistance.”

So King Matt gathered up one of his beloved daughters, Princess Emma, and traveled to the next kingdom.  But alas, the Duke was unable to help and the king searched for one among his subjects who may have the tools necessary to remove the bolt.  The king went searching far and wide to find a master mechanic who could remove the bolt.  He searched in vain.  One master mechanic went so far as to tell him that the entire oil basin had to be replaced.  The king was not amused, and he was not to be defeated.

He decided to try it one more time…

VICTORY!  King Matt, using the brute strength that years of laboring with his subjects had given him, was able to pry the bolt loose without damaging the edifice.  Upon close inspection, the king learned that the “master mechanic” who had changed the oil previously had used the wrong size drain plug, and had forced it in place with a magical tool called a pneumatic driver.    Only determination and power lent from on high could have allowed the king to loosen it.  King Matt gave his beast fresh oil and repaired the damage using the correct size drain plug.

The moral of the story: Often the so called “experts” are full of it.


3 Comments Add yours

  1. Cari says:

    Love it! And glad you were able to get it changed…


  2. Amy says:

    This made me chuckle. We had a similar experience years ago. The King @ our house always takes care of these things too and it annoys him, as well, when things are done right. Happy day! All is right in the kingdom, carry on.


  3. Heather says:

    Love it :)


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